You Just Don’t Get It (Chap.5)
I don’t know where I am exactly, I just drove until I stopped crying… Why was I crying? Oh yeah my boyfr-, Harry blames me for leaving him but he doesn’t get that it hurts me and that I’m not happy. I could of stayed but Harry told me to leave and live my dream. I guess I could of fought harder, to stay. But I made a decision to leave and get my degree. Yes, I fucking get it… its my fault but that little wanker didn’t have to sleep with every girl that moved. I spent all my time in the U.S crying over him and when I wasn’t I still wanted him to be there with me. I understand that Maybe he was trying to cope with the idea of me and him being apart too and that was the reason why he slept with eveyone, I mean he got on a comma because of me for fucks sake. He didn’t have to be such a mamwhore though, and he serteainly didn’t have to tell me. I- I’m trying to forgive him and let it go but I felt nothing but dissapontment.
I looked around and saw trees and a river with ducks swimming by, I looked down at my watch and saw that it was almost midday. I guess I had been here a while. I decided that I needed to head home and take a shower or at least eat something. I was about to turn on my engine when someone knocked at my car door. I looked at the women in confusement but she looked scared. I got out and she began to cry and shout. “What’s wrong love, are you hurt?” I asked and she looked at me in the eye “He’s coming, help me” she wispered and I didn’t quite understand. Before I knew it she had taken the keys from my hand and got in the car. I turned to look at her but I felt a push from behind me and then I was on the ground. I had hit my head with the pavement, I heard a car screetching then the side of my body was in pain. “You bloody idiot, you let her get away!” The bastard started to kick me some more then he got on top of me and he began to punch me over and over. The pain was unbearlable and after a while of the beating I felt nothing, my whole body became numb and I couldn’t say anything or move. Everything was turning red and then black…
"HARRRYYY!" Mandy whined as I gave it to her hard. "OH G-G-GOD" I couldn’t help but smile of how I had her melting in my arms. To be quite honest she wasn’t that good, I mean I’ve had better. I got off her and I couldn’t of been happier because she kissed like a dog. *For my mistakes I had to press one, must play But my actions will cover for my decay Rivers will fall back Gonna take you back to the first time I met you I tried my best but I’m so sorry I upset you* my phone began to ring. "Ello?" I answered and Zayn was crying and was sounding rather scared. "Harry? I-I can’t do anything. They won’t tell me what’s wrong, They don’t let me see him." "Zayn where are you what’s going on? What happened to Niall?" I asked panicing. "I’m at the Sunland Rivers Hospital He can die Harry, Louis can fucking die… *Niall grabs the phone* "Harry where the bloody hell are you? Get over here now, they don’t think he’s going to make it." As soon as I heard those words I got up and put my clothes on. I ran down the stairs and then remmembered I had taken a cab to Mandy’s. I looked around and saw keys so without thinking I grabbed them and let myslef out.
"C’mon MOVE" "HEY DICKHEAD, GET THE FUCK OUT THE WAY" "BLOODY HELL" I was swearing up and down until I got to the hospital and Niall and Zayn where outside. Zayn was smoking and Niall was talking on the phone. "HARRY! Where where you man I was trying to ring you, whatever then mate at least you’re here." I then recond that I had left my phone at Mandy’s . "Niall how is he? What happened? Where is he? I should of been with him. I should of not been where I was. I could-" A million questions were being asked all together. "Harry!… He got beaten, badly and has multilple stab wounds… they’re not sure he can make it. He loss a lot of blood and he isn’t looking so good. He’s in room D100, and Harry…" I stopped listening and I began to run. I got to the room and I opened the door, what was laying there was not Louis. My Lou is a boy with beautiful tanned skin and a smile so big that it can light up a room, with hair that makes you want to grab it and yank it so hard until he says your name and lips so perfect that makes you want to kiss them and bite them and never let go. What was laying there was NOT my BooBear. What was laying there was a purple boy with bumps in his forehead and eyes with yellow and black around them. Lips chapped, red, cutts that go all the way down to the end of his chin. Bandages with blood that cover most of his hair. That was not Louis, it can’t be. "Sir you need to get out!" I heard the doctor, but he can’t pull me away from him now, Louis’s afraid of hospitals and he needs me. I just stood there watching him, listening to one doctor telling me to leave and the other yelling at the nurses to get more cloth for the blood. Then it all went quiet, and there it was the only thing that I was afraid of happening. He was crashing, the annoying sound that ment that Lou could be dead in a matter of seconds. I didn’t feel anything, I couldn’t feel my heart beating and I couldn’t feel my legs. All I could see was people running in the room and out pushing me out of the way and loud loud screams. All of it, the running, the pushing it came to the point of slow motion. "Call It"… I looked at the doctor and it all hit me, my Lou was dead. NO, NO, NO IT CAN’T FUCKING END LIKE THIS!!! "Do something, you can’t stop! I beg you please I can’t lose him again… KEEP TRYING!" I yelled and one of the doctors gave me his apologies but the other quickly got on top of Lou and began to try to revive him one more time. "OMG"…..
If you are not sad today I congratulate you. Today has been filled with a lot of emotion, Liam has a new girlfriend. Harry has been seen kissing another girl, Liam is pretty much really madat us. Louis doesn’t talk to us anymore. Zerrie’s engaged our little Irish man is the only one on our side. I’m happy for Zayn, he and Perrie deserve happiness and more. But the fact that he’s growing up and now he’s engaged! Harry hasn’t spoken to us about the pictures and Liam spoke to us but he’s mad. We need to fix this Fandom we need to fix it fast because it slowly crumbling. They think we’re all 12-year-olds & that just shows you that They don’t know us at all. I’m 16 and I am speechless about how little information they have on us but I don’t blame them. I don’t blame them for thinking that we’re horrible people that sometimes we don’t let them live their lives I blame us “Directioners”. we are so caught up in this fantasy that they will love us and in reality they don’t know who we are personally. Stop sending hate to their girlfriends stop sending hate to them STOP. What we are going to accomplish is them giving up and finally breaking up because they can’t handle it anymore, could you handle it? No because we don’t think of what we do. We hide and judge behind a keyboard and a screen and we don’t think about what we’re doing we need to stop before it’s too late and things can be fixed anymore.